We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize