I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
