whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
