i just google imaged poop.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
