when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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