so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
