Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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