So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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