is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
My boob is missing a layer of skin
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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