So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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