The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
This show inspires me to have sex in space
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
