they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Randomize
