If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
