A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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