Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
