yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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