whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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