Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
