So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
