After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
