She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
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