i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
The best revenge is premature balding
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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