I must be too annoying 4 u.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize
