You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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