Well douche your snatch and let's go!
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
