i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Randomize
