btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
