I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Randomize
