If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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