I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Randomize