bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
