Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
