so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
My penis needs a shock collar
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
