You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize