i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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