Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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