YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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