I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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