My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
