I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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