Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
