I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
