I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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