Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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