Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
worst night to have a conscience
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
