Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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