glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
