what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
