I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
operation harelip BJ is a go
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Randomize
