whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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